Posts Tagged ‘financial stress’
Wednesday, August 11th, 2010
By Carolyn L. Rosenblatt, RN, BSN, Attorney
A social worker from the Alzheimer’s Association called today, to ask about a client. Her mother has dementia. The mom doesn’t have a durable power of attorney. A crisis is looming.
 If your parent is no longer safe about making money decisions, or your parent is vulnerable to manipulation (these two things go together), they are creating a serious problem. If your parent loses ”financial capacity” as we call it legally, they can’t sign documents relating to money, such as loan papers, withdrawal slips from the bank, and such. You can’t sign them either unless you have been legally appointed to do that. Some people just sign their parent’s name. That’s called forgery. Don’t.
Please see my recent article for FORBES.COM
Some people have the parent sign, even though Dad has no idea what he’s signing and can barely remember how to write. That’s not safe to do legally either. What if someone accuses you of manipulation, or financial elder abuse?
I think a careful, respectful approach can work to persuade a parent to cooperate with getting this document signed. After they’ve gone too far down the road of dementia and can’t manage money anymore at all, it’s too late. That can sneak up on you. It doesn’t have a clear path, a set amount of time, or alarm bells along the way.
Here are five tips for getting your parent to cooperate with getting a durable power of attorney signed.
1. Start with you, or call on the most trusted, most respected person in your parent’s life. Another relative, a friend, the doctor, a nurse, the clergy person will all do as your allies. Decide who will make the approach. Pick a good time of day or of the week.
2. Approach your parent with respect. You’ve got to gently tell Mom it’s time to plan for the future. You’ve got to let Dad know that you don’t want anyone to rip him off. Insist very gently.
3. Suggest the right person for the job. The person who has been in financial trouble, who is not good with money, or whose motives are doubtful is NOT the one to pick to be anyone’s power of attorney for finances.
4. You’ve got to supply the document. Here’s a free one for CA you can download by clicking on this link. It will generally work in other states too, or you can likely get one free for your state, too.
5. Be sure you have a notary to go to or one who will come to your parent’s home to notarize the document. That’s essential, as having the durable power of attorney notarized makes it legally valid.
Tags: aging, elder law, elderly, familiy relations, financial abuse, financial elder abuse, financial stress, legal, power of attorney
Posted in Elders' Financal Responsibility | No Comments »
Tuesday, March 9th, 2010
HOTEL KEY CARDS 
Ever wonder what is on your magnetic key card?
Answer:
a. Customer’s name
b. Customer’s partial home address
c. Hotel room number
d. Check-in date and out dates
e. Customer’s credit card number and expiration date!
When you turn them in to the front desk your personal information is there for any employee to access by simply scanning the card in the hotel scanner. An employee can take a hand full of cards home and using a scanning device, access the information onto a l aptop computer and go shopping at your expense.
Simply put, hotels do not erase the information on these cards until an employee reissues the card to the next hotel guest. At that time, the new guest’s information is electronically ‘overwritten’ on the card and the previous guest’s information is erased in the overwriting process.
But until the card is rewritten for the next guest, it usually is kept in a drawer at the front desk with YOUR INFORMATION ON IT!
The bottom line is: Keep the cards, take them home with you, or destroy them. NEVER leave them behind in the room or room wastebasket, and NEVER turn them into the front desk when you check out of a room. They will not charge you for the card (it’s illegal) and you’ll be sure you are not leaving a lot of valuable personal information on it that could be easily lifted off with any simple scanning device card reader.
For the same reason, if you arrive at the airport and d iscover you still have the card key in your pocket, do not toss it in an airport trash basket. Take it home and destroy it by cutting it up, especially through the electronic information strip!
If you have a small magnet, pass it across the magnetic strip several times. Then try it in the door, it will not work. It erases everything on the card.
Information courtesy of: Metropolitan Police Service.
PLEASE FORWARD to friends and family
This is pretty good info. Never even thought about key cards containing anything other than an access code for the room!
Tags: aging, aging parent, elder abuse, emotional, financial elder abuse, financial stress
Posted in Caregiving Support | 1 Comment »
Tuesday, February 16th, 2010
I am hearing more and more about how someone in a family gets an elder with dementia to sign a durable power of attorney when the person is no longer competent to know what they are signing. 
© 2010, AgingParents.comOther siblings are upset and angry about manipulation of the vulnerable elder. Is it legal to get a signature under those circumstances? Of course not. But people do it to take control of money and believe that they can get away with it because the elder won’t object and because it’s expensive to try to stop the person who is the “agent” on the power of attorney.
Is there anything one can do if this has happened to your elder? Yes, there may be something you can do. First, if the elder has “cognitive impairment” or has been diagnosed with dementia, it is important to get a letter from the elder’s physician verifying that he or she is not competent to handle his or her finances any longer. Without medical or psychological evaluation of the elder and evidence from one of these professionals, it is almost impossible to protect the elder from financial abuse.
One way around the problem is to seek the advice of an elder law attorney, who may be able to convince the court to order an evaluation, even if the “agent” objects to having the elder tested for competency by a doctor.
If an agent on a durable power of attorney has taken control of the elder’s finances and is not using the elder’s money for the elder’s benefit, it may be time to get the authorities involved. Taking an elder’s money and using it for any purpose other than to care for and protect the elder’s health, safety and quality of life may be financial abuse. If so, it must be reported to the police, adult protective services in your area, or to a doctor, who will report the problem to the proper law enforcement entity. The letter reporting the evaluation of the elder’s mental competency is a crucial part of reporting alleged elder abuse. Without it, law enforcement may not be able to tell who is being truthful and who is not.
Carolyn L. Rosenblatt, RN, Attorney
Tags: aging, aging parent, aging parents, aging parents health, cargiving, denial, elder abuse, elder care, financial stress, paying for care
Posted in Caregiving Support | No Comments »
Monday, February 8th, 2010
| Tips to Avoid Financial Strain With Aging Parents |
| CHICAGO (AP) –Staying on track to a comfortable retirement isn’t only about taking care of your finances and your health. It might involve taking care of your parents, too. |
| Baby boomers and others saving diligently for their later years are taking bigger risks than they realize if their plans don’t include contingencies for aging parents. |
| ”It’s really hard to think that your parents are going to need your support,” says Amy Goyer, family expert for AARP. ”But you really need to think about that and do some planning.” |
| The more you can look ahead and not wait until you’re in a crisis to plan, the better. Your own retirement may be at stake. |
| An estimated 38 million Americans provide care to an aging relative. The president’s proposed budget for 2011 adds $103 million for programs that help elderly adults stay in their homes through in-home services, transportation and other support programs. |
| Often, though, it’s financial support rather than physical care that is needed. That can be just as draining and at least as devastating for older workers who have limited earning years before retirement. |
| Dave Swoyer, a 52-year-old bank executive from Voorhees, N.J., thought his father was doing all right money-wise. John Swoyer, now 84, lived alone in his own home in a neighboring town and was relatively healthy. |
| Then one day in 2007 John expressed concern that he might outlive his savings. Doctors said John might live another 12 years and, though he didn’t want to be a financial burden, he needed help. |
| Dave looked at his father’s finances and saw they were riddled with high-risk investments, such as junk-bond funds. He turned to his financial adviser for help. |
| Then Dave did something he realized should have been done earlier: He sat down with his two sisters for a family meeting about what to do when their dad can no longer live on his own. |
| Today John Swoyer’s finances are in better shape and Dave and his sisters are more or less prepared for the next financial or health crisis. |
| ”We’ve reached kind of an understanding on what may happen and what we would all do,” says Dave Swoyer. ”I can’t imagine having that conversation after a stroke or after a doctor says ‘Your father can no longer live alone.”’ |
| Here are some steps to help prepare for when aging parents may need your assistance: |
| 1. HAVE A CONVERSATION WITH YOUR PARENTS. |
| Don’t wait for Mom or Dad to bring up the topic of what happens when they no longer can manage on their own. |
Often families are in denial about aging, preventing the conversation from taking place, says Carolyn Rosenblatt,
an elder care attorney and author of ”The Boomer’s Guide to Aging Parents.” |
| Have an open and honest discussion before a crisis occurs. The children need to ask, ”Have you thought about the future and what would happen if you couldn’t be completely independent?” Ask if they feel OK about their finances and their ability to support themselves indefinitely. Do they have money set aside to pay for home health care or assistance with daily living? |
| Discuss the circumstances under which it would be appropriate for you to help manage their finances. And make sure they have two basic and essential documents: a durable power of attorney, for financial decisions, and a health care directive or power of attorney for health care decisions. |
| 2. HAVE A CONVERSATION WITH YOUR SIBLINGS. |
| Talk with siblings about what you may be facing in a few years. |
| Is anyone going to quit work to care for ailing parents, or take them in? Is an assisted-living home best for all concerned? Is everyone prepared to chip in for home health aid if necessary? How can the caregiving be made fair? |
| If one sibling is going to live with an aging parent as the primary caregiver, everyone needs to agree on a monetary value for that and what that person will receive. An account could be set up where all contribute a certain amount per month. And a lawyer could draw up caregiver contracts. |
| Everyone may not agree on all issues or be able to contribute equally, but the earlier you confer the better. |
| The Swoyers found this step challenging because of the siblings’ vastly different financial situations. In the end, the consensus was they would take turns with caregiving duties at their father’s home. |
| ”It may be an uncomfortable conversation,” Dave says of a chat with siblings, ”but later it will be emotionally charged because of illness and competing wishes among the siblings over what do to.” |
| 3. ASSESS PARENTS’ FINANCIAL CONDITION. |
| Get familiar with your parents’ financial health. Know the sources of their income –pension, Social Security or other retirement account –and the amounts. Consider having them list you on their accounts as it may be necessary in a crisis. |
| Do they have other means available to raise cash in a pinch in order to stay in their home or pay bills, such as a reverse mortgage? Do their investments need to be reallocated to make their level of risk more age-appropriate? Seek out a financial adviser to help resolve these issues. |
| Know what Medicare covers and the costs of what it doesn’t. Many people are shocked to learn it does not cover in-home care, among many other expenses. |
| Costs can add up fast, as reflected in average costs based on 2008 data from the Department of Health and Human Services: $29 an hour for a home health aide, $59 a day for care in an adult day-care center, $18 an hour for homemaker services, $3,008 a month for a one-bedroom unit in an assisted-living facility. |
| Having parents move in with one of the children, or everyone pitching in for in-home assistance, can help keep the costs from derailing everyone’s retirement plans. |
| Make financial and other plans with the expectation that older parents will live to a ripe old age. Be sure a financial adviser structures their investment portfolios accordingly –perhaps calculating life expectancy as 100, says Rosanne Roge, a registered financial gerontologist in Bohemia, N.Y. A 70-year-old has a 47 percent chance of living to 85 and a 3 percent chance of reaching 100, according to actuary Jim O’Connor of Chicago consulting firm Milliman Inc. |
| It may also mean fixing up their house so they can comfortably remain there longer, which could ultimately ease their children’s financial burden too. Stairway lifts, widened doorways and other modifications to accommodate people with physical disabilities are tax-deductible. Check with a tax expert regarding other home improvements. |
| Make sure they have long-term care insurance, if they’re not too old or infirm to qualify at affordable rates. Buying a policy on their behalf may help protect your retirement funds in the long run. |
| Most important of all, don’t duck preparing for a life event –and costs –that may be inevitable. |
| ”The most important thing is to recognize that it’s likely that elders who live a long time are going to need some help,” says Roge, ”and you have to pay for it some of the time.” |
| Copyright 2010 The Associated Press |
Tags: aging, aging parents, aging parents health, financial stress
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